Life slowly converging and its happening from the inside

There is a stirring in my heart.  It won’t go away.  Even when I bury it with nonsense and distractions it continues to show up.  I feel as if my life is slowly converging to a point where a significant, direction-altering step will have to be taken.  Not ready to put it into words since I am not even sure what it is all about.  I just feel tugs and pulls and see things around me differently.  Today does not look like yesterday and it is not the days that are changing … it is me.  My worldview.  My perspective.

And yet I don’t really know what is going on… or where it is all leading.

It is me… and it is from the inside.

My heart yearning for You

If I stop long enough to quiet the noise of life… I can hear my heart yearning for You.  If I pause for more than just a moment I can almost hear the pain.  The pain of being apart from You.

But the noise is often too loud.  It is a beautiful noise… of family, of a blessed life… but I still need more of You – Lord.

Please.

Lord.

More.

The Most Brutal of Enemies

Time. Can either be on your side or it can be your enemy. It mercilessly ticks on by. Ignoring your pleas as you desperately want it to slow down… even if just slightly.

You can partner with it and make the relationship work, but it is not one to be trusted quickly. And never make it your enemy. If you don’t learn how to walk with it through life it is capable of being the most brutal of enemies… the most ferocious of combatants. Leaving your dreams and your plans bludgeoned behind you. Incomplete plans… unfulfilled dreams… unmet expectations.

Or you can simply surrender it all and allow the One who is greater than time… in fact the One who is outside of time! He can mark your path, guide your steps and allow for your dreams and the desires of your heart to blossom and prosper in His will. And whatever doesn’t would not be Time’s fault. It would simply be because it wasn’t the best for you.

Time won’t choose your best because time doesn’t care.
He will choose your best… because He loves you.

In Serious Need of an Update

Haven’t been here for a while.  Just took a quick glance at this mess and only one thing comes to mind – I need to update this place.  Neglected, abandoned … pretty much alone except for the occasional Google search that brings someone here by accident.  When they do get here they quickly click away.

But isn’t that the same with so many areas in our life.  Sometimes things … sometimes people… sometimes issues.

A thing is just a thing.  It is just stuff!  So it doesn’t really matter if it is left untouched in the basement or if it lays forgotten in the garage.  Part of the clutter we all accumulate.

But people and our relationships with those people are important.  Starting with our relationship with God and then quickly moving to our family (spouse, children, parents) and then moving on to our friends.  Many times these relationships lay untouched.  Neglected.  Ignored.  We haven’t spent the time and slowly we drift apart.  The closeness we once had becomes only a nostalgic memory.  Sad.

And then there are the issues in life that we ignore.  Our anger, our moodiness, our bad habits.  We neglect dealing with these at our own detriment… our own cost.  The problem is that unlike the stuff in our basement these issues continue living.  Continue simmering and even growing.  These are not things we can simply ignore because they are part of us and in some ways even define us.

Let’s start picking some of this stuff up.  Organizing our lives and our hearts … prioritizing what is important and decluttering in order to have time for that which is important.

Top on our list should be our relationship with God.  If you can spend time nurturing this one and getting to know Him, you will quickly see how much easier it becomes to clean up and deal with all the other neglected people, things and issues in your life.

This is where I need to start and this blog may come later… :)

Settling In

Boy… never thought the move from Toronto to Houston would be such a big deal. I think I was being naive… it was a ton of work and we are still not done!

The most important thing is that we still have God’s peace and we feel that this is where He wants us to be. Not sure I understand why He moved us down here… but enjoying it a lot! When you know you are in His will it makes it easier… even when things don’t perfectly line up or when you are having a down day.

Pressing on!
Pressing forward… and seeking His will.

Moving to Houston

Not exactly sure how it happened… But it probably feels a bit like being caught up in one of those cartoon snowballs that keeps growing as it goes down the hill.

It happened to us.  The conversation just happened.   We were not looking for it and were not expecting it.  Not even sure how long we will be there for.  One year? Five years?

We prayed about it and both Nena and I have the Lord’s peace as we prepare to relocate our entire lives down there.

In some ways the move is an answer to certain personal prayers we had… although we never thought the answer would come in this way.  But I know that when the Lord does something, He does it for many reasons and that we can expect surprises from Him down there.  Even to the point that what we think may be the main reason is only a side one for Him.

Definitely expecting great things from the Lord down there.  Will hopefully document it through this blog if I suddenly become more disciplined when I get to Houston.

The answers we want

From time to time we come across situations that rattle our theology… And leave us with many questions and no answers.

A good friend of mine is grieving the death of his marriage. It is not only that he is a good friend. He is also one of my mentors…a person that has impacted my life and ministry enormously.

I don’t even know where to begin. Not even sure what to ask God… Or if I should just wait… The answer always comes. It is just that many times the answer we want or the answer we were trained to expect is not the one we get.

Thang God He is our answer. And He is still in control.

I will wait and pray. All I can do even when I don’t understand.

Staring

Didn’t get a good seat at Starbucks. So I am just staring at the people with the good seats… Hoping they go away!

Problem is … They’re not making eye contact.

The Man I Am Not

So often I am confronted by the fact that I am not the man I need to be. The man I want to be …and the man my family needs me to be.

But the Lord tells me in His word that He will be strong where I am weak.

He also tells me that the battle is His.

Although I can’t do it on my own I know that He is with me.